"The Resolution" by Jack's Mannequin

My issues consume me until I get them resolved. And I've come to realize that most of life's stress comes from either fear, or unresolved issues. I pray so hard for the strength to sort out the confusion, the grace to find the resolution, and the opportunity for restoration.

"Chemicals React" by Aly and AJ

Today I heard a song that I haven’t heard in a long time. It took me back to a different place. A place unexpected. It’s funny how songs can do that.

This song reminded me of someone I care about at their best, at our best. I took me back to a place of innocence, where the though of the immense heartbreak I feel now was known to be an impossibility. I was more sure of this than life itself for I believed in it as much as I believe in God.

Just the essence of this song flooded the strongest feelings of love I’ve ever known into my suppressed conscious. I can honestly say that I was never as happy as I was then, with myself and with him. The thought of this alone brings tears to my eyes, and I can’t tell if it’s because the memories are so beautiful, or if it’s because now they are gone. I’m willing to bet it’s the latter.

And now that the impossible has become my reality, my heart aches and longs for a time like that again. To be so sure of something that you would risk it all, even bet your life on it. How does one get back such innocence? How does one get back that kind of strength when everything inside of you has been shattered and broken? Maybe I’m just in rehabilitation for my wounds aren’t as crippling as they were before. But the wounds are still healing and I can still feel their pain and see the scars that they left. Any hope I have comes from remembering how it was, and how it would all be worth it to be there again. It’s just so hard.